The plan

If you read yesterday's post, you'll know why the plans looks as it does.... I apologise for the length (and potential tedium) of this post in advance!

1) Home :- we have agreed that Shropshire is the county for us for multiple reasons - rural and spacious, much less traffic, historic towns, beautiful walks and a sense of community, good value for money in terms of house prices, my brother lives there, centrally placed in UK so easier for the kids to visit when they are spread all over the place. Mr D feels that the look and feel of the house is more important to me, so will defer to my preferences on the whole. We would both like a house big enough to have all of our children back, plus partners/spouses and children in the future (even if it means blow up beds and sleeping bags) and room for frequent visits from friends. This is important to both of us as we both love entertaining. We both want a large kitchen and some kind of real fire or log burner. He would like space for table tennis. I want a barn/workshop for revamping furniture, so the two could overlap. I really want an older house with character - celebrating the imperfect! As I want to grow my own veg and fruit and keep my lovely chickens, I would like at least an acre. Originally I wanted more as I intended on keeping goats and ducks, but I fear I am alone in that, so I will compromise. Mr D can't cope with the idea of eating anything he has 'raised' which puts a spanner in the works rather! But he is happy to help out in the garden and likes the thought of homegrown food. In terms of budget, we are looking at about £350,000 for which I think there are a number of potential properties. Originally we were thinking quite remote, but having discussed it, we are both leaning towards being a little closer to civilisation whilst still retaining views and dog walks on the doorstep. A small holidays one in France is still on the wish list :) 

2) Career and work. I want to prise Mr D out of his highly stressful, long hours job for the sake of his health and our relationship. We came to the conclusion that any form of income generation will have  to be multi pronged, comprising part time supply teaching for him, perhaps a part time shop/admin type job for me and possibly other, smaller income prospects like selling home made produce, letting out rooms, occasional B&B and selling on revamped furniture and craft creations made by me. Whatever happens, our income will fall considerably as Mr D is presently on a good wage and neither of us are anywhere near pension age!  We discussed how our entire lifestyle will have to change in order for this to work, but we are both ready. At least we know that as and when we can start drawing on our pensions pots, it will provide us with a decent amount to live off. 

3) Relationships and family. This topic raised an interesting issue. We agreed that we wanted to make this new step together (well, you never know....). I asked how he felt we would spend our time when the children left home. His response was of shock and panic at the very thought of them leaving, even though, two have already, to all intents and purpose left and a third is on the verge of leaving next autumn. I think the empty nest syndrome may affect him more than me. Personally, I'm looking forward to spending time alone with my husband and making the most of being able to please ourselves. That's not to say I don't love my children and I don't love being a mother, but surely the main point of being a parent is to prepare them for the world at large and then release them into it? We did both agree wholeheartedly that we would love for our children to feel they could come home at any point for visits and that they would want to and we aim to create a home that will provide for this.

4) Friends. On similar lines to the above, we would like our friends to come and visit regularly. We have been fortunate to have made some wonderful and treasured friends along the way already, so we would like them to stay in touch where possible. To make new friends, we will need to go out and socialise. We are both fairly sociable although I love my own company which Mr D does not (as in his own company rather than not enjoying my company!), so he will no doubt be looking to go out more than I would choose. The restrictive factor of disposable income may make a difference there! 

5) Health. We agreed that we will continue to eat well, predominantly vegetarian and home made from scratch. My exercise will come from the garden and dog walking, his will be supplemented with running and joining a tennis club (I'm rubbish at sport, he is an ex PE teacher and very good at most sports). Emotionally, we agreed that we would try to be more aware of one another's moods and try harder to respond appropriately to them. I think this will be easier in our new life. 

6)  Character. When I asked Mr D where he thought his strengths lay, he was unable to tell me! Seriously?! How many times have we sat with students encouraging them to write positive things about themselves in college applications or personal statements! Eventually, we decided that his strengths lay in bringing a lightness and humour to our family life and in striving to maintain links with our friends and the wider family. My strengths lie in driving things forward and seeing that things are completed - a starter/finisher as my Headteacher used to describe me. As a couple, we share the same values, we are both nurturers and balance one another out well if we are working well together. Our weaknesses lie in not always being able/willing to see what the other one might need and not always talking things out rather than stewing. We agreed we need to work on better communication and, on a practical level, keep  trying out basic DIY skills to see just how much we  can do for ourselves (I'm certainly more gung-ho than he  is in this respect!) 

7)  Activities and Hobbies. Mr D would quite like us to join a ballroom dancing class together. We would both like to become part of the local community - volunteering, quiz nights, organising events etc.  He would like to continue with some sport, I'd like to continue with my crafts. Mr D said he would like to start cooking more and I'd want to attend some classes to learn better needlework skills. I'd quite like to start up yoga again - I loved it before but my tutor left and I couldn't warm to the next one. We discussed how I would need Mr D to help more in the garden and around the home to enable us  both to have free time whether that be apart or together. I have always done the lion's  share of all things home related and I'd like to share this more. In terms of saving for something special, we would both love to go back to the Maldives and there are multiple other places both nationally and worldwide we'd love to visit if we are financially able to. 

8) Finances. Now this is the trickier bit. We are fortunate to be in a strong position financially going in to this but we have to decide whether to keep this house, rent it out and buy the new house in shropshire with a small mortgage raised on this one. The rental from this  house would cover the mortgage and pay us a regular income. Or should we sell this, buy a new house in Shropshire as cash buyers and then use the remainder to buy smaller houses to let out in Shropshire making it easier to manage them and building up a small  portfolio. OR do we sell this, buy a new house in Shropshire with the cash and then invest any remaining cash? There are some outstanding factors to play a part  in this, so we will have to wait until the new year before seek professional advice (we can get excellent free advice through Mr D's Union). Meanwhile I'm going to contact some local rental agencies here and get this house valued again so we have all the information to hand.

So there you have it (if you've kept awake to read it!) - the plan in detail. Any thoughts?